Wednesday, 31 December 2008

Happy Birthday Andy

It's Andy's birthday!

And by way of a birthday present, we present:

The Carruthers review of the thirteen months of the year that was 2008...

Nothing happened.

An Evening With Mr Caruthers is held in Hoxton in London. More on that story later.

A lot of talking.

Filming took place for the A Writer's Meeting videos

Rehearsals for the forthcoming show took place, this blog started and the Writer's Meeting videos began to appear on YouTube in an eclectic order.

We Peeled.

Nothing happened.

We all got too busy for Carruthers. Like twats.

Nothing happened.

We were approached by Funny or Die about using our videos. We accepted and they did a little dance. Maybe.

Nothing happened.

Moustaches were grown.

More filming took place and we look forward to sharing the fruits of our labours with you next year.

P.P.P.P.P.P.S. On the sixth day of Christmas, my true love sent to me six geese a-laying, five gold rings, four calling birds, three French hens, two turtle doves and a partridge in a pear tree.

Tuesday, 30 December 2008

It's the only bit everybody knows...


P.P.P.P.P.S. On the fifth day of Christmas, my true love sent to me five gold rings, four calling birds, three French hens, two turtle doves and a partridge in a pear tree.

Monday, 29 December 2008

Not Prostitutes

Calling Birds.

P.P.P.P.S. On the fourth day of Christmas, my true love sent to me four calling birds, three French hens, two turtle doves and a partridge in a pear tree.

Sunday, 28 December 2008

Hench Frens

Do they taste French?

P.P.P.S. On the third day of Christmas, my true love sent to me three French hens, two turtle doves and a partridge in a pear tree.

Saturday, 27 December 2008

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle Doves

Well you give me all your lovin'
And your turtle dovin'
Ah all your hugs and kisses
And your money too, well
You know you love me baby
Still you tell me maybe
That someday well I'll be blue

P.P.S. On the second day of Christmas, my true love sent to me two turtle doves and a partridge in a pear tree.

Friday, 26 December 2008


And have a Joyous Kwanzaa.

P.S. On the first day of Christmas, my true love sent to me a partridge in a pear tree.

Wednesday, 24 December 2008


Get a good night's sleep, you've got a big day tomorrow...

Fire hazards for all.

Tuesday, 23 December 2008

Noche de Rábanos

Which means Night of the Radishes in Spanish.

Every year since 1897 on the 23rd of December, the people of Oaxaca in Mexico have flocked to see the sculptures carved from radishes. The bulbous pink beauties are transformed into nativity scenes and saints but sadly not the cast of Fraggle Rock.

I kid you not.

Sunday, 21 December 2008

The Shortest Day Of The Year

In the bleak midwinter...
There will only be seven hours and forty nine minutes of daylight today, so go careful. Or quickly.

Go quickly. The quicker you go, the better. Whatever you've got planned today, rush the shit out of it.

Never put off 'til tomorrow what you can do today, unless it'll take longer than seven hours and forty nine minutes.

Saturday, 20 December 2008

A Winter's Tale

So the debates rage:

Will it snow on Christmas Day?

Will it be a White Christmas?

Is it racist to say White Christmas?

Is it racist to sing White Christmas?

Is it weird that people think that the phrase 'White Christmas' has the potential to offend when the song White Christmas was written by a Jew, namely Irving Berlin, who told his secretary the morning after he wrote it: "I just wrote the best song I've ever written, hell, I just wrote the best song that anybody's ever written!" or is it the perfect example of how Christmas has been re-appraised and re-appropriated to suit the needs of our modern society and has become a more secular celebration of family and therefore was ahead of its time?

It probably won't snow on Christmas Day.

Friday, 19 December 2008

Maybe Baby

Christmas is a time for family. Where are your children? Are they safe? Are you certain?

Babysitting without due care, attention and parental instinct is a terrible and growing phenomenon.

For that matter, where are your parents? Are they safe? Are you certain?

Thursday, 18 December 2008

His 'n' Hers

Don't know what to get that special someone in your life? Well some kind soul out there has made it easy for you. It's not us, we're not a shop, but we will be featuring some of their more interesting products. Now you and yours can walk around with Carruthers emblazoned across your collective bosom.
What more could you want?

Wednesday, 17 December 2008

Wright About Now

105 years ago today, Orville & Wilbur Wright proved that flight was possible, thus opening up the world to new possibilities...

Pollution, warfare, terrorism, deep vein thrombosis and food served in trays would never be the same again.

Monday, 15 December 2008

Zamenhofa Tago

Bonan matenon/vesperon/nokton!

So strap a trosekeco onto your prapatro and wiggle it about like you haven't used it since vivbezonaĵoj. Give your fariĝis a rest and rub on some videblas later.

Today is Zamenof Day, the most widely celebrated holiday in Esperanto culture.

Whatever that is.

Sunday, 14 December 2008

Monkey Business

It's Monkey Day!

No, I don't know what it means either, but off you go. Monkey about.

Friday, 12 December 2008

Full Moon

Half Blind.

Did I hear a wolf?

I SAID, DID I HEAR A W...oh never mind, I'm sure it's just a pygmy stoatsnatcher regurgitating a barely chewed previously swallowed monkey. On ice.

Thursday, 11 December 2008

Vane Mane

In response to this post

We now present this video in its original intended hobo scream free form.

Wednesday, 10 December 2008

Shop Shape Merrily On High

With only 14-ish shopping days left 'til Christmas, have you got time:

to put together that list of gifts for your nearest and dearest?
and buy them?
and wrap them?
and label them?
and hide them?
and find them?
and give them?
and tidy up after them?

It's a bloody full time job.

Monday, 8 December 2008


Punster: "Ding, Dong"

Recipient: "...merrily on high,
In heav'n the bells are ringing:
Ding dong! verily the sky
Is riv'n with angel singing.
Gloria, Hosanna in excelsis!
E'en so here below, below,
Let steeple bells be swungen,
And "Io, io, io!"
By priest and people sungen.
Gloria, Hosanna in excelsis!
Pray you, dutifully prime
Your matin chime, ye ringers;
May you beautifully rime
Your evetime song, ye singers.
Gloria, Hosanna in excelsis!"

Punster: "Crikey."

Friday, 5 December 2008


Two hundred posts. Who'd have thought it?

Posts with videos - 6

Posts with photos - 180

Posts with swearing - 9

Posts with tags - 175

Posts accidentally posted twice - 5

Posts containing spelling miftakes - 0

Posted comments - 7

Most common tag - Peel This

Most commonly used letters (in no particular order) - e, s, p, p & p

Wednesday, 3 December 2008

Tuesday, 2 December 2008